Essay

Lois Duncan’s Holiday Memories

Lois Duncan shares this hilarious holiday moment that she says turned her off of cooking turkey for future holiday dinners.

Sometimes, it’s the unexpected that makes the best holiday memories. Lois Duncan shares this hilarious holiday moment that she says turned her off of cooking turkey for future holiday dinners:

Lois Duncan


“I don’t know if you’d call this my “favorite,” but it’s certainly one I will never forget. I was a single mom, living in New Mexico, and my parents flew in from Florida to join the children and me for Christmas. I decided to invite all my single friends who would be alone for the holidays to join us for dinner Christmas night.  Guests arrived around 5 p.m., and after serving cocktails, I went out to the kitchen to make the gravy. When I opened the door of the oven, I discovered a cold, raw, 22 lb. turkey. My father, who was obsessed with saving electricity, had walked through the kitchen early that afternoon, noticed the oven was on, and automatically turned it off.  I was frantic. I kept refilling glasses and praying for a miracle, (if Christ could turn water into wine, surely he could roast a turkey in ten minutes time!). Sadly, he did not comply.  I ended up slicing off slabs of raw meat and running them under the broiler. By the time I got dinner on the table, my guests were so sloshed that I could have served anything and they wouldn’t have known the difference.”

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